Thursday, February 28, 2019

New Updates 2019....

Good Morning Everyone,

It is 7:30 on Feb 28, 2019. This year has started out terrible. I would like to fast forward to better things...

First off, I have been doing Ride-Share as a FT job since Oct of 2017. As the markets progress, and more drivers are added to the platforms (Uber, Lyft, etc) Making the same amount of money started getting harder and harder. Things in my personal life set things back a bit, a roommate out of work.... I have never complete recovered, when the slow time hit in driving. From the beginning of Nov to the beginning of Jan. (Sema to CES) it slows way down.

My mother passed on Jan 15, 2019. I found like 2 weeks later. I have been estranged from my mother and the rest of my family for years. I am an adopted child, who had some trouble adjusting to a 'normal' life. Mom and I had issues, which made me rethink life. I chose to walk away instead of always being angry at her, and fighting. So I believe it had been 5 years since I last spoke to anyone. However, that being said, she is still my mother and I love her. I have been dealing with guilt over not being there the last year, she was diagnosed with a rare form of Leukemia and chose not to treat with Chemo... The last year of her life, she and my foster sisters, and nieces had tried to reach out to me. I found out through Facebook Messenger via a friends Messenger that mom had died. My niece reached out to friends on my FB, to try to get a hold of me. It was a very rough week. I am still having bouts of depression and guilt. I will probably carry some of that until my final days....

I also ended up losing my car 2 weeks later... It was repossessed for lack of payments. I expected it, just a hard time to lose your income.

I had begun a year ago to treat my medical issues with Cannabis Products. I started out just using CBD for my depression and anxiety. It did such a great job with that, I proceeded to try out THC Vaping for sleep. My health has started to improve, and I don't take any prescription meds now. I have graduated to being an actual Medicinal Pot user. Which now at this point in life has made job hunting very difficult. Even though Medical and Recreational Cannabis use is legal in NV, most employers follow Federal Law in which employees must pass a drug test, for ALL drugs, even Medicinal Cannabis.

I am almost 50 years old. The longest job I held at one time was my previous one at Wal-Mart. It is a stressful job, I liked some associates I worked with, but that wasn't enough to make me keep dealing with changing policies, Managers playing favorites, or just plain unfair work practices. I decided I was done. To start working for myself. So I did.

But now I find myself unable to deal with all the BS and red-tape crap that most companies come with. I want to find a job that I love, that brings me joy. In fact all that I am looking from now on, is things that bring me happiness and joy. All things stressful, unkind, etc I am weeding out of my life.

Which brings me to employment hunting.... I have narrowed down a few things that I think would bring me joy and happiness, as well as an income.

1. Working in a Witchcraft store. (Magickal Shop) I am a witch after all.
2. Working at some capacity in a Cannabis Dispensary Store.
3. Working in a Sex Toy Shop.

All are customer service related, which I have loads of experience in. I have a working knowledge in Pagan/Wiccan Studies. I also use and have been taught the usage of Cannabis strains, what they do, on a personal level. As a former BBW Model, I have a love of sex toys, and lots of experience on what works for me, and am not a shamed to talk about them. Plus what  fun environment all 3 of these would be.

Lastly if I could do anything???   I would own my own store. It would have a Specialty Diner, (low-carb, Paleo, Keto, etc) A book/coffee shop, as well as an area for Magical Items, CBD products, and Sex toys... I would have a special place to also sell any of my friends homemade products.... I would also hire all my close friends to help me run different areas based on their skill sets. THIS, THIS would be my ideal life to live out the rest of my working adult life...

I want to start traveling as well. Cruise, all inclusive resort stay in the Caribbean, just get out of America and see the world.. This has always just been a dream of mine, I don't have the funds to all that, heck I don't even own a passport yet...

Loosing my Mom, made me realize that holding on to all that anger and pain just  held me back from living. I am trying to prioritize the people that are most important to me, so I stop pushing everyone away from me. Letting go of the negativity I have lived with most of my life. I want better, I need to do better, and this year as hard it has started out, is the best time to make those changes.Can't go anywhere but up right?

Bright Blessing to you and yours. May all your dreams start to come true.